If any of you know me in person, you know I’ve been playing a lot of softball lately. It seems to be winding down as our co-ed team is in tournament play and Tuesday night my ladies’ team finished the last regular season game.

The game Tuesday? Was frustrating and painful. We played the first place team. Please don’t get me wrong – I wasn’t frustrated with anything anyone else on my team did. I was totally frustrated with me. I hit to the first baseman twice and made it very easy for her to get outs. Then I hit to the pitcher but somehow managed to beat out the throw. I was mad. I was determined to get there. And when I did beat out the throw? Something I never would have been able to do before I started to workout? I was still mad because I hit it back to the pitcher. I couldn’t even give myself credit for running hard.

Wednesday morning came and I was still down. I really tweaked my quad muscle and it hurt to walk. Our co-ed team was supposed to play our next game in the tournament and I didn’t feel like going. Duck’s group (which I run sound for) was supposed to be playing at a church service. He wasn’t going to the game which was disappointing because we were missing a few other players too. We had decided the group could do without me so I could go to the game, but the way I hit Tuesday, I didn’t have any confidence to go play.

Then the wonderful news came. Ball game canceled. I could let my leg rest. Our players would be back for the make-up game Monday. This was great news.

So I got to go to the church service. And. Oh. My. Did God show up and give me a reality check. See, this was no regular church. At least, not like you and I know it. This church is part of an intermediate care facility for the mentally retarded – profound, severe or moderate mental retardation.

Many were escorted in wheelchairs. Many were just escorted. I fought back tears as I realized how amazingly blessed I am to have 2 fully functioning arms and 2 fully functioning legs (even with a pulled muscle!). How blessed I am to be able to hold a bat, grip a ball or run the bases. I realized softball is just a game and it’s supposed to be for fun.

The biggest realization came when Duck’s band played “He’s got the whole world in His hands” — because it was then that I realized how truly mentally handicapped I am. Here were many who were doing the hand motions and singing as best they can — and they were truly worshiping God. They weren’t worried about what anyone else thought. They weren’t worried about what anyone else was doing. They just sang and bounced and had a grand time! I should be like that when I worship God! A child-like faith.

I thank God He had us right where He wanted us to be last night.

Tonight my ladies’ team plays the first place team again as the first round of the tournament starts. My prayer is that I will realize how much I am blessed to even be out there on the field and win or lose, have fun playing the game.

First, thanks everyone so much for the birthday wishes Friday! For my birthday I got to get up super early and go on a school field trip. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be — though I was still really tired. Top it off with dinner with my parents, sister, great-niece and of course Duck and Doodle and it was a pretty good day.

Thanks to everyone who prayed for me Saturday. The dinner went really well. The band sounded great (of course they have a pretty good sound person ) and I managed to get up there and ramble a lot. I was so nervous — I could hear my voice shaking, but evidently it didn’t sound that bad to everyone else. Or they wouldn’t tell me. Which leads me to the big question I have after the weekend.

If someone is really bad at speaking, would you tell them? Or would you tell them you enjoyed it and they did a good job — just so you wouldn’t hurt their feelings? These are the things that have crossed my mind because I think I’ve felt God leading me to speak — but that scares me to death — and I’m not sure I heard Him right. So, I look for confirmation in other ways, but I also know no one will come up to tell me I suck as a speaker if I do even if I really want that feedback. I’m a mess aren’t I?

Oh, I had flashbacks to when I was about 5 years old. I was in front of the microphone at the church I went to as a child and all I had to do was recite John 3:16 (part of the Christmas play). I froze. I saw my Daddy sitting about half-way back in the church and I just ran and sat in his lap. I was majorly embarrassed because people laughed — Mom said it was because they thought I was cute. Ugh. My buddy behind me said my verse and hers and then I felt a little more stupid. Dad came with Mom and I made him sit up front — the only man sitting with the ladies (thanks to the church men for serving him too!). I couldn’t look at him while I spoke for fear I would just run over and sit in his lap again. Everything’s right in the world when I’m on my Daddy’s lap!

Anyway, I felt really down after I spoke. I didn’t say nearly 1/10th of the things I had planned to say and I’m pretty sure most of it came out in the wrong order. But, I had been praying that whatever comes out would touch at least one person. The pastor came and told me after the dinner that someone spoke to him because of my testimony. He said God had been dealing with that person and my testimony kinda pushed them over the edge. Praise God! He can use a donkey and He can use my ramblings!

I know I can do better at speaking or that I can learn what I need to learn, but I guess I’m not totally convinced this is God’s will for me or just my imagination working overtime. Because I can imagine myself speaking very eloquently and it was nothing like that in real life

Lastly, thanks to everyone who sent Happy Mother’s Day wishes my way. I hope you had a great Mother’s Day as well. I spent mine playing in a couple of softball games. I played some really good ball in at least one of those games

My heart is breaking.

When I had the honor of meeting Especially Heather last year and going to She Speaks with her, I would just sit and look at her in awe. She, herself had been through so much. I don’t think it ever registered with me just how much she’s been through with Emma. And still going through.

Emma recently had been in the hospital for 6 weeks, able to go home but then started having seizures. She’s back in the hospital again. You can read updates on Heather’s site to keep up with things there or look at Heather’s Twitter page. You can also make donations to Emma’s hospital fund on Heather’s site.

One of the most important things we can do is pray. Pray for Emma. Pray for Heather. Pray for their family. Pray for the doctors and nurses.

The next thing we can do is to let Heather know we’re praying for them. The ladies at DaySpring have made it possible for me to send a gift basket of cards, but I need your help!

1. Go to http://www.studiodayspring.com/cardbasket.php and make a card. There are suggested sections, but you can choose any card that you feel expresses your heart. You can change the text on many of the cards to fit this situation. You can also add your own text, pictures, clipart or message.

Please be creative in this. Draw signs that say you’re praying for Emma and take a picture to put on the card. Write her name in the sand if you’re near the beach and take a picture. Personalize these cards to the max! I know you can!

2. At checkout, use the promo code: GCHEATHERAPR13. The checkout will show a $2.99 charge but the promo code will cancel that out. There is no charge for Studio DaySpring printing this card and sending the basket. I hope you will let @incourage know how much you appreciate their love and willingness to set this up for Heather. You do not have to put in an address for shipping — the promo code will group all the cards together for the basket.

** Edited to add** You will need to put in your address in the Recipient’s screen. The system will not let you pass that screen unless you put something in there. The promo code will gather all the cards into the same basket.

Please save your design. Take a minute and create an account to save your design. There have been people who have submitted cards that I’ve found out are not showing up in the system. Please let me know that you have created a card so I can make sure it went through the system correctly and shows up in the basket! Either leave me a comment here or email me.

3. All cards must be designed and submitted by April 13th!

4. Come back here and leave a comment telling me you’ve submitted a card. I’ll enter you for a drawing for Sheila Walsh’s new book “Get Off Your Knees & Pray.” I’ll close the drawing April 13th and choose the winner the next day.

Help me spread the word. Submit a card or two. I would love for Heather and her family to get this basket and be able to wallpaper the hospital room with beautiful cards from all of you.

This is a new system for Studio DaySpring. Please email me and let me know if you have any problems whatsoever creating the card you want or if you have questions. I’ll me more than happy to find out answers.

{think Gomer Pyle when you read the title because that’s how I sound}

I’ve mentioned here before that I am the Techie Girl over at She Seeks (a division of Proverbs 31 Ministries targeting 18-29 year old women). Now, I have to tell you, I love my P31 peeps to death, but really I had no idea why God has me working on a site targeting this age group. I’m so not in that age range any more, and really? I don’t feel like I have anything to offer up but my techie skills.

But last week I sent an email to Lisa W. who is the team leader of She Seeks and we started talking about Valentine’s Day. Yeah, I know it’s over, but I’m still talking about it. I’m talking about it over at She Seeks today.

That makes me nervous and feels really funny. This is the first time I’ve officially written something for someone else that will be somewhere else other than the ramblings of this blog. Years ago when I made the statement on this blog that I am a writer, I don’t think I even dreamed of writing for another site like this.

I remember what it was like when I was in that age group. Even though I’m older, I’m still getting good stuff through the devotions over there and I think you will too.

Go check it out. If it sucks, I give you complete permission to lie to me

PS. Duck so didn’t listen to me. He brought home a dozen red roses for me and a red rose for Doodle. He says he never agreed to the deal I thought he had — I realized I was just talking and he never said one way or another. I love you Duck but you’re hard-headed

Let me reassure you, I.do.not.

After I wrote my prayer post Monday night, where I laid my heart out there, honestly it felt great. It felt great to write like that again. The type of writing that I’ll know one day I’ll go back and read and not believe it was really me who wrote it.

Then Tuesday comes and I found out that a few tweets I’d sent out upset someone. If you have that little nagging feeling you shouldn’t tweet something (or Facebook status something) then don’t. I need to pray about my tweets too.

Nearly the whole day I felt frustrated and angry. School is out yet again (3rd day) for snow. We’ve been cooped up in the house since Friday. As much as I would like to blame it on PMS, I know it’s just my flesh fighting back. See, when I finally made the decision not to go to BlissDom, I felt God’s peace about it. I knew it was going to be hard when it got to the week of, but I thought I’d be ok. Honestly though I’ve been fighting having myself a pity party. So I’ve been praying.a.lot.

If you are going to BlissDom, it’s going to hit — if it hasn’t already. One or all of your children will start crying or fussing about how you are going to be gone. Things won’t get done. The house won’t be clean. Mommy guilt sets in. If you’re not going, it’s going to hit — if it hasn’t already. Plans change. Snow hits. You’re trapped inside your dusty, dirty house and don’t feel like cleaning. Kids get sick. You get sick.

I am praying for you. The devil doesn’t like it when we’re going about doing God’s work. He wants to distract us with those things that we think we should be doing instead. If you know it’s God’s will for you to go, then also trust in God to take care of things at home while you are gone. If it’s God’s will for you to miss this one, then focus on Him and what He’d have you do instead — maybe it’s joining me in prayer for our sisters in Christ to not be overwhelmed, to fight off temptation and make the better choice.

So, please don’t think I’m some great spiritual prayer warrior. Prayer is more than the most important thing — it’s necessary for survival — for every one of us.