God’s been faithful in that He’s revealing His purpose for me and even given this non-graphics person an idea or two for changing the look. And then there’s Relevant. It’s a blogging conference for Christian women but I know it’s going to be so much more. And I’m getting rather nervous about flying out Thursday to go there for the weekend. I’m going to be rooming with my buddy, Amy Bayliss, and we have so much to talk about

If you’re going to Relevant, I wanted to share a little about me especially in case we meet in person — I feel it’s only fair to warn you of these things! I wrote this originally in July 2009, but it’s still true today:

Maybe you click … maybe you don’t

And no, this post doesn’t have anything to do with the internet, or websites, or ads.

Many of my bloggy friends are going to BlogHer next week. The week after, some of us will be at She Speaks. I’ve seen lots of tweets, blog posts and comments about how everyone is feeling before going to these conferences. My post is going to be primarily about She Speaks, but I’m sure you can get some helpful information for BlogHer.

Maybe you click …

Last year I sort of organized a lunch at Chili’s the day She Speaks started. I say sort of because evidently I didn’t make the right Chili’s known to everyone — half of us were at one, half at the other. God blessed me with meeting Robin at my Chili’s. Robin has a gift ya’ll. She’s outgoing and smart and witty. She can talk to anyone about anything and has such a warm Southern spirit. She makes you feel relaxed and before you know it, you’re telling her your life story. I don’t know of anyone that wouldn’t click with Robin — but that’s because of her, not me. I pray you’ll meet at least 3 people who you click with at the conference.

Maybe you don’t click …

Over the weekend I met many ladies. I dare say I never clicked with any of them like I did Robin, but I did click with some of them. Some of them I felt so awkward around! One, who I will not name (even though I’m pretty sure there’s no way she’d ever read my blog), just said “oh, I know who you are.” That was it. I went totally out of my comfort zone and introduced myself, and that was the line I got back. She walked off and continued clicking with the other ladies there. What I’ve come to realize is that it may not be me, so I shouldn’t take it personally.

Reasons we may not click …

I’ve learned a lot about myself at BlissDom back in February. Here are some reasons you and I may not click if we meet at She Speaks. Maybe it’ll help you to look at meeting people from the other side.

1. I am a Southerner. I not only talk slow. I listen slow. Seriously. If you come up to me, introduce yourself and you get a blank stare? I may just be processing what you said 2 sentences ago. Give my brain a few seconds to catch up. I’ve met some Northerners that I really have to focus and listen. My brain has to slow down what they are saying before I can even try to carry on a conversation. If you happen to be a fast talker? Try to slow it down a little when you meet me, ok? I’ll work on listening faster, promise.

2. I am an introvert. I don’t know exactly when it happened. Maybe I have always been one but when I was a teenager I wanted to be the life of the party. I get overwhelmed easily. I know this and I am going to work in some quiet time for me and God into this conference. Instead of feeling like I’m going to miss out on something, I’m going to sit quietly and regroup before going back around people. What this also means for you who meet me also goes along with #1 above — if you come up to me and start talking and you get the “deer in headlights” look, it’s me — again trying to process everything that’s going on. That might be a good time to ask me if I need some quiet time

3. I am different. Not that drastically different — we all are similar in many ways. But maybe we don’t have anything in common. It’s possible. You may be a city girl — I’m a country girl. You? beach. Me? Mountains. You? Pepsi (yuck!). Me? Coke. That doesn’t mean that we can’t talk, but we may not click like you’ll see others do. There are going to be roughly 550 – 600 women at She Speaks (1,500+ at BlogHer). You will see ladies clicking together and forming what will be very deep, life-long friendships. You may long for that. I know I do. But for whatever reason, you and I don’t click? Don’t take it personally. Be kind and courteous and just move along to the next person.

Back row Baptist …

In all of my examples above, it was you coming up to me — did you notice? I am very happily a back row Baptist. The kind who likes to hang out behind the scenes most of the time. I may be sitting in a corner or the back row of the conference room. Don’t let that stop you from saying hey — that’s hi for you Northerners and no, it’s not just for horses! I’m going to do my best to force myself out of my comfort zone and make the first step. I’m also going to do my best to remember not to take it personally if I don’t click with someone. Maybe that person isn’t the one God wants me to develop a relationship with today. That’s ok.

One more thing …

Lots of ladies are worried about what to wear. Honestly I know She Speaks has said “no jeans” sort of thing, but I am not a fashion person at all. I am not going to remember what you wore to the conference. What I will remember is your smile. Is there hurt in your eyes or excitement? Did we click? What did we talk about? Those are much more important things that what you wore — to me anyway. I’m not concerned at all with outside appearances but with the heart of the matter. There will be tons more ladies there like me than you would think. So don’t stress it. Bring your best. God sees you. He loves you. He has big plans for you. Don’t worry about what you’re going to wear — I’m pretty sure that’s biblical

I talk about She Speaks, but you can apply it to Relevant just the same … except there are only going to be about 200 women there so the chances of you meeting everyone increase

Looking forward to meeting some of my online buddies in person for the first time … and seeing old online buddies again!

Here’s what I’ve written before…I hope it still helps you!

Written before the 2009 She Speaks conference:

Maybe you click …

Last year [2008] I sort of organized a lunch at Chili’s the day She Speaks started. I say sort of because evidently I didn’t make the right Chili’s known to everyone — half of us were at one, half at the other. God blessed me with meeting Robin at my Chili’s. Robin has a gift ya’ll. She’s outgoing and smart and witty. She can talk to anyone about anything and has such a warm Southern spirit. She makes you feel relaxed and before you know it, you’re telling her your life story. I don’t know of anyone that wouldn’t click with Robin — but that’s because of her, not me. I pray you’ll meet at least 3 people who you click with at the conference.

Maybe you don’t click …

Over the weekend I met many ladies. I dare say I never clicked with any of them like I did Robin, but I did click with some of them. Some of them I felt so awkward around! One, who I will not name (even though I’m pretty sure there’s no way she’d ever read my blog), just said “oh, I know who you are.” That was it. I went totally out of my comfort zone and introduced myself, and that was the line I got back. She walked off and continued clicking with the other ladies there. What I’ve come to realize is that it may not be me, so I shouldn’t take it personally.

Reasons we may not click …

I’ve learned a lot about myself at BlissDom back in February. Here are some reasons you and I may not click if we meet at She Speaks. Maybe it’ll help you to look at meeting people from the other side.

1. I am a Southerner. I not only talk slow. I listen slow. Seriously. If you come up to me, introduce yourself and you get a blank stare? I may just be processing what you said 2 sentences ago. Give my brain a few seconds to catch up. I’ve met some Northerners that I really have to focus and listen. My brain has to slow down what they are saying before I can even try to carry on a conversation. If you happen to be a fast talker? Try to slow it down a little when you meet me, ok? I’ll work on listening faster, promise.

2. I am an introvert. I don’t know exactly when it happened. Maybe I have always been one but when I was a teenager I wanted to be the life of the party. I get overwhelmed easily. I know this and I am going to work in some quiet time for me and God into this conference. Instead of feeling like I’m going to miss out on something, I’m going to sit quietly and regroup before going back around people. What this also means for you who meet me also goes along with #1 above — if you come up to me and start talking and you get the “deer in headlights” look, it’s me — again trying to process everything that’s going on. That might be a good time to ask me if I need some quiet time

3. I am different. Not that drastically different — we all are similar in many ways. But maybe we don’t have anything in common. It’s possible. You may be a city girl — I’m a country girl. You? beach. Me? Mountains. You? Pepsi (yuck!). Me? Coke. That doesn’t mean that we can’t talk, but we may not click like you’ll see others do. There are going to be roughly 550 – 600 women at She Speaks (1,500+ at BlogHer). You will see ladies clicking together and forming what will be very deep, life-long friendships. You may long for that. I know I do. But for whatever reason, you and I don’t click? Don’t take it personally. Be kind and courteous and just move along to the next person.

Back row Baptist …

In all of my examples above, it was you coming up to me — did you notice? I am very happily a back row Baptist. The kind who likes to hang out behind the scenes most of the time. I may be sitting in a corner or the back row of the conference room. Don’t let that stop you from saying hey — that’s hi for you Northerners and no, it’s not just for horses! I’m going to do my best to force myself out of my comfort zone and make the first step. I’m also going to do my best to remember not to take it personally if I don’t click with someone. Maybe that person isn’t the one God wants me to develop a relationship with today. That’s ok.

One more thing …

Lots of ladies are worried about what to wear. Honestly I know She Speaks has said “no jeans” sort of thing, but I am not a fashion person at all. I am not going to remember what you wore to the conference. What I will remember is your smile. Is there hurt in your eyes or excitement? Did we click? What did we talk about? Those are much more important things that what you wore — to me anyway. I’m not concerned at all with outside appearances but with the heart of the matter. There will be tons more ladies there like me than you would think. So don’t stress it. Bring your best. God sees you. He loves you. He has big plans for you. Don’t worry about what you’re going to wear — I’m pretty sure that’s biblical

Written before the 2009 conference:

Business cards

The subject of business cards for She Speaks came up on Twitter, and I was asked for my advice. Last year I printed mine out on my ink jet printer a day or two before I left for She Speaks. I’m thankful I did. At conferences most people will have business cards to exchange. This helps get your contact information out there to people and helps you remember who you met (hopefully!). I have to admit, I have gotten some business cards for ladies I met that I don’t remember meeting. I must have been that deer-in-headlights when I talked to them!

If you are just getting started, I think it’s perfectly fine to print out your own business cards. They may not look as professional as others, but if you’re just starting out — people understand. You can also get some good quality printed cards online for a reasonable amount of money — though some places will send you 500 as the smallest package. I didn’t give out that many at She Speaks last year but that may have been because I was fairly shy Even if you are “just a blogger” I think it’s good to have a business card for your blog. You do want people to go read it, don’t you?

Information to include on business cards

I would include at least your name, blog url, and email. I do not include my address or my phone number for a couple of reasons. These are personal reasons and you may feel different — that’s your perogative

I don’t include my address because you most likely don’t need it for any reason. Seriously, all my work is done online and if you had to ship me something? I’d prefer you just shoot me an email to get my address. Kind of the same thing for my phone number. My preferred method of communication is email. I’m not saying I won’t talk to you on the phone, but if we need to talk about something that we can’t communicate through email, you can email me and we can exchange numbers. I prefer to setup a time to talk also, so the email gives us a chance to set that up. Not that I think you’d stalk me or anything, but I don’t just want my home phone floating out there — or my cell phone for that matter Of course if you Twitter, you might want to include your Twitter id as well — although if you have that linked from your blog towards the top in a prominent place, you may decide to leave that off.

Take a break

If you are like me and get overwhelmed easily (by either the number of people around you or the information you are learning), remember to take a break. I think last year I was afraid I’d miss out on some big opportunity if I went away from the crowd for a minute or two. I stayed in a separate hotel last year and even though it was right down the street, I didn’t want to miss anything by getting in my car and driving there. Just don’t feel bad if you need to sneak up to your room for a few minutes of quiet time. You’d be amazed at how refreshed you’ll feel!

Remember to call home

This is a big one for me — as in, last time I forgot to do it enough. My Genius Better Half tends to let his imagination run a little wild when I’m out of town without him. He tends to think about things like me going off for dinner and being attacked. Pleasant stuff. So, I need to remember to call home and check in every now and then. It’s also good (if you have a worry-wort better half) to leave a schedule of the sessions. That way he will have an idea when you’ll be in between sessions and he can call you if you haven’t called him.

Drinks, snacks and such

As everyone knows, I am a Coke addict — I prefer it in the red-and-white can, but will take bottles happily. At the conference (with all the meals and such) you can get water, tea, and I think they even did coffee here and there. But if you need a little stronger pick-me-up in the middle of the day, there’s a little store in the lobby of the hotel where you can get important things like Coke and chocolate It was really late in the afternoon on Saturday when I found this little nugget out — I was going into serious withdrawals ya’ll!

Whatever happens … DO NOT MISS THE PRAYER ROOM! You can read about my 2009 experience here.

After the conference, you’ll probably feel a bit of a let down. Read what I mean here.

Make sure you follow me on Twitter, and give me a hug when you meet me — even if I have that deer in the headlights look

I’ve written, edited, and re-written this post a million times in my head. Every time I feel the need to preface it by saying you might not be like me and my husband may not be like your husband. I really hate to get into comparisons, so please don’t compare yourself to me because God made us all unique and similar. My official preface to this post would have to be, take what I say with a grain of salt and 3 cups of sugar. Not sure what you do with the salt, but the sugar will give you a good start to some southern sweet tea!

I’ve actually written some pretty good things in other posts about preparing for conferences — not just BlissDom. I have gone back and looked, and this one is a really good one … Maybe you click. Maybe you don’t. Seriously, go read it. I’ll wait {insert some upbeat, worshipful, inspiring music here}

Back? Good. Seriously stop stressing the clothes and whether or not you’ll make a friend. I don’t care who you are, you’ll make a friend. I say that with a lot of confidence because I know that if you’re reading my blog? You’ll make a friend or ten at BlissDom. I know some wonderful ladies going. Ones I wish I could hug their necks and listen to them talk all night. Some of them big bloggers, but they don’t know it — or at least they don’t act like they know it. Last year I wrote Angels at BlissDom and I think everyone is going to be back at BlissDom this year. So be on the lookout for those ladies. I know they’ll make you feel welcome.

Here’s another great post I wrote last year — What I learned about me at BlissDom. {insert more music}

Back? Ok, yeah. I know that’s a lot of reading. So you just want the highlights? Well, here are my highlights with another preface or ten — I’ve been working from home for 10 years now. I’m used to spending all my days interacting with people through email, messaging, Twitter and Facebook. Duck is not only my husband, he’s my best friend. We really enjoy going and doing things together and I don’t do the typical “girls night out” thing. Not only is he my best friend, he’s the worrier of the family, and generally he likes the standard schedule. When I’m gone? There’s no such thing as a standard schedule. So if you are anything like me, and/or your hubby’s anything like Duck — read along

• Pray. Start now. Pray for the travel. Pray for your family to survive you being gone. Pray for what sessions you should go to — what parties you should go to. Cover the whole thing in prayer. Seriously.
• Don’t stress the clothes. I don’t remember what anyone wore last year. DO pack comfy shoes. We didn’t have to walk a lot last year, but Opryland is considerably bigger than the hotel we were in.
• Know your bloggy purpose. If you don’t know for sure what your bloggy purpose is, keep these thoughts in the back of your mind while you’re there. Think on them. Once you know your bloggy purpose, decisions start to become a lot easier. Just writing for family? No ads. Writing about your interior design passions? No Ragu ads (tip straight from The Nester herself) or rather control your ads. Writing a frugal blog to help supplement income? Ads out the wazoo.
• Make some kind of business card with your name, email, twitter handle, and blog address (at a minimum). Even if you are just writing for family? You’ll make friends who you want to exchange info with and keep up with after BlissDom. Wanna be really cool? Include your picture. I’m horrible with names/faces and sometimes I wish I could see a picture.
• Look at the sessions ahead of time. See what fits into your bloggy purpose. Are you looking to become a better writer? Or are you looking to increase your income with ads? Knowing your bloggy purpose will help make the decisions easier. See a pattern yet?
• Schedule breaks for yourself. Quiet time. Short periods of time where you can refocus. I’m used to listening to music all day not hearing a gazillion conversations going on at once. It takes brain power to process that much information. Trust me. Don’t get overloaded. Take a break.
• Take a few snacks with you. I know there will be food there. I’m strange though — some of it honestly is a bit too fancy for me. Also sessions will inevitably run late no matter how well they are planned out. I typically need to eat *something* every couple of hours. When you’re used to working in the next room from your snack drawer, you might be a little spoiled. On top of that, if I miss that certain window of opportunity to get food — I get extremely a little cranky, ill and sick feeling.
• Let your family know when/how often you will be calling and then keep that time — no matter what. Even if you *just* talked to them 4 hours ago and don’t have much to say now — they may want to just hear your voice and know you are still alive. Remember, they are sitting at home with time on their hands. They aren’t experiencing the new stuff you are — meeting new people, going to exciting sessions, flying on airplanes, etc. Just do whatever you have to do to make yourself stop for a minute and call. This will probably sound like a no-brainer, but when you get there and take in so much information? Your brain may just disappear … or rebel … trust me on this. Setup alarms on your phone. Be sure you take into account the time difference (because your cell phone will automatically change to Nashville time!).
• Forgot to add my other tip — check out the Blog Hop here and add your blog. Get to know attendees before-hand!

I think some of the other posts you’ve probably read by now contain other good tips. What you haven’t read the other posts? Check them out! Link up your posts below and feel free to copy the code and put this on your blog!

So I put it on the calendar. As the weeks progressed, other things got added to the calendar. Like the Upward Basketball schedule. Duck and I are coaching Doodle’s team again this year. I really enjoy it, but our practices are on Thursday and the games on Saturday. Ok, I thought. I can miss one practice and one game. But Duck can’t. Not really. Oh, and Upward pictures are that Saturday. Hmmph. I don’t want to miss those too.

Then Duck’s on-call schedule was released. He put the dates on the calendar. Yep, he’s on call that week. So he’s really, double-y triple-y out of going. And that was the final feather that knocked me off the fence onto the side of not going. See, Duck’s on-call weeks are very stressful to him. I need to be here to run things. I need to be here to run practice and the game if he happens to be called into work.

It’s not that he couldn’t handle it. Seriously we are blessed with great grandparents that take Doodle and do what’s needed. But I need to be here. I’ve been praying for quite awhile that God would lead me one way or another — that if I go, He’ll work everything out. If I don’t go, He’ll work everything out. And He has. I have His peace inside me that I need to be here {see an obvious pattern?}. I’ve already sold my conference ticket to another Christian lady who said I was an answered prayer. While God was closing the door on me going — He was opening the door for her to go. Seeing as how the conference is now sold-out, I can see how He used me buying that ticket for His good.

Don’t get me wrong. I not only need to be here, I want to be here. Maybe I will meet ya’ll next year if the scheduling falls just right. I still have some advice I’m going to give ya’ll who are going and I’m definitely praying for all my friends who will be there.

Go enter my Women of Faith giveaways (ends today!) and I’ll be back tomorrow with the winners, and BlissDom advice!

Reentry is hard.

But many of us were dealing with things back home. When we stepped off the planes we had to adjust. We had to hold back. Perhaps the airport is not the right place to dump all of our enthusiasm on our families. Perhaps they were really thankful that we were home and wanted to share their stories instead of hearing ours. Perhaps we did or did not do something that hurt them or made them angry while we were gone.

Reentry is hard.

But they are often hard on themselves when they don’t see all these things happening on a daily basis. They are quick to observe all they are doing wrong and slow to appreciate all they are doing right.

– Power of a Praying Woman, pg. 36 by Stormie Omartian

This is me. To a capital T. I am hard on myself for everything I did wrong. When I look back over the weekend, there are things that I did wrong and things I did right. The ones eating at my soul are the things I did wrong.

Reentry is hard.

This morning I sat down with my journal and poured my heart out to God. I couldn’t even put into words some of what I am feeling, but I know God knows and understands what I need. I also prayed for the other ladies I met this weekend who are going back home to bigger struggles than I can even imagine.

Reentry is hard, but God is bigger than my problems.