This is a hard post for me to write. People keep asking me about She Speaks and how wonderful it was, and the truth is — it was good, but not as great as I expected it to be. But here’s why — I am not as close to God as I should be. I prayed off and on before this conference, about this conference, and for the team of people. I did not pray consistently and I didn’t have my quiet time.
When I have my quiet time every morning, I am in tune with God. I pick up things from my day that God wants me to realize. Don’t get me wrong. The conference was great — great speakers, great teachers, and tons of information flowing. But I can’t help but feel that I missed out on insights because I was not properly prepared or spiritually in the right place to receive them. That is a hard pill to swallow.
I usually pray and ask God to make things very obviously from Him. I did feel His presence this weekend — especially during Lysa’s general session Friday night (I had been experiencing the exact same things she talked about), but I didn’t have one big ah-ha! moment. After taking some time to process the weekend, here are the main takeaways for me.
- Quiet time is vital: I haven’t been having mine, and I can tell. My focus has not been on God and what God wants me to be doing. I need to pray and study His Word before I catch up on all the blog reading or even sitting down to write.
- I’m more introverted than I thought: This weekend I realized I really am introverted. After being at the conference for a few hours Friday, I was totally drained and needed quiet time at the hotel. We won’t talk about how many flips my stomach did at the mall Saturday night eating with fellow bloggers. There were so many people in the mall and so much noise.
- I desperately need to find stronger deodorant. I know you were not expecting that one! On Friday, they had a special bloggers’ reception. Great idea in theory. Get all the bloggers into a small, hot room and let them mingle. Maybe the room wasn’t that hot — and I was just that nervous. Some are huggy bloggers and some are not. Then there’s always the fact that you may read them and feel like you know them well, but they don’t know you? Or if they know you, maybe they don’t like you? And there I stand, the wallflower, praying that no one smells me because my deodorant has failed.
I am very content being a behind the scenes person. While I may dream of one day standing in front of a crowd delivering a message like Lysa, it’s not going to happen any time soon — and it will totally be of God. I noticed Holly, Lysa’s personal assistant. She was absolutely great about pulling Lysa from stalkers talking and getting her where she needed to be. Holly was so humble especially as I tried to convince her she needs a blog (and Holly if you read this, I’ll set you up with one anytime you’re ready!). Lysa is an absolute sweetheart and while I can relate to Lysa and Holly, I have a feeling my introvertness leads me to be behind the scenes like Holly.
The biggest confirmation I got all weekend was in MaryBeth‘s Bringing Passion to Your Platform. Blogging is my passion. Teaching others how to use blogging to communicate within their ministries, that’s where my heart is. The absolute hardest thing for me all weekend was to sit in the blogging sessions and biting my tongue. Don’t get me wrong. The ladies who were leading these sessions did a wonderful job. I just wanted to share so much with these ladies — even more than I’m sure we had time for. So while I may be introverted, if someone got me talking about blogging, I could talk for hours.
There were so many there who don’t know how to blog. I hope that Proverbs 31 learns from this. I hope that they add more blogging sessions next year, and if it be God’s will, maybe I can even go and teach some of those sessions. Because while speaking in front of 550 women makes my stomach flop, I know I could stand in front of a classroom and teach women about blogging. And even if it’s not God’s will for me to do this at She Speaks next year? You better believe I’m going to be teaching you through simply His blogger.
My buddy Robin @ Pensieve put up a Mr. Linky for attendees and presenters to share their She Speaks posts. Hop over there to read more amazing stories from those who were more in tune with God before they went.
Lisa,
I loved your post and the emotions you felt at the conference. As a fellow introvert in a sea of extroverts, I too found it overwhelming sometimes. But one thing I’ve found, its not usually in the crowds but in the quiet corners that God speaks to me — usually in a whisper.
It was a pleasure to meet you. Sorry we couldn’t connect on the Harley ride
Thanks for your passion for helping us newbie bloggers! Every gift is valuable to the body of Christ.
Blessings,
Kelli
KelliGirl's last blog post..The Wind in My Hair (A Look Back at She Speaks)
You know what Lisa? I always sensed there was so much more going on behind your eyes, thoughts you weren’t “ready” to share. This might be some of what I was seeing.
Your blogging/techie knowledge is enviable; that you’re so willing to help others is a blessing. Thanks for that
.
And…I had to giggle about the deodorant thing. I was sweating, too, wondering HOW COME IT’S SO HOT IN HERE–I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO FREEZE! Everyone was having the same thoughts you were in that room…it was both a great moment and a self-conscious moment wrapped into one venue.
Robin's last blog post..5,418
I am glad you are able to be honest. You have done so with graciousness and truth. I know that I wished I had been more prepared with a speech or book proposal and maybe another year will get more out of what is offered if I know what I am getting into. There was still plenty to learn but I don’t feel like I took advantage of every opportunity offered that could have been a huge benefit to my own goals.
Interesting insights. Thanks.
Sarah (Genesis Moments)'s last blog post..Bunny Camp at Grandma’s
I wish I could have went…but I can relate to what you are saying…I too tend to be an introvert in a group. To others, I may seem bored or distracted, but in reality, I am just trying to figure out how to fit in. And quiet time…I’m lacking there as well…I struggle with that a lot!
Annabelle's last blog post..Speaking of Animaniacs…
I think it is natural to feel overwhelmed by such a crowd of ladies…I know I was! I too was content to watch everything that unfolded around me. It takes a lot of energy to interact and share. I did some of that too, but as the weekend went on and I was sooo tired, I just watched. It gave me a sense of peace. It’s hard to hear God’s voice in the midst of a lot of noise! I giggled at your deo comment, I have a similarly politically incorrect thought: the only quiet I felt was when I was using the restroom! They had that lovely Musak and I was alone…
Blessing to you!
laura's last blog post..Unpacking…
Wow that room of bloggers was overwhelming huh? And I thought I was an extrovert. I really am, but I grew to be that from being a shy child. I felt much more like that shy child that day. It was overwhelming.
I too could tell that you had more behind your eyes than you were showing to everyone. That is sooo natural. I would love to hear more of your thoughts on how I can use my blog to minister in fact I have some questions I’d like to run by you if you’d be willing could I email you or give you a call?? Let me know! Thanks
Alyssa's last blog post..Christian Writers, Speakers & Bloggers, Oh My!
Sweet Lisa…
It was a joy to meet you. And do you know what I did when I left the reception… sighed, reapplied deodrant, and went to my next meeting.
You are not alone sweet sister.
And your insights about the necessity of having a quiet time is right on.
I am SOOOO blessed that you got something out of my coughing fit… I mean, session.
Your words were a balm to my soul today. Thanks!
Oh, and I wanted to add– two years ago when I went to She Speaks, my biggest takeaway value was that I needed to reinstitute my daily quiet time and really make it a priority instead of just talking about it. This was HUGE for me that year– so, you aren’t the only one God speaks that to through the venue of She Speaks.
Dear Lisa, I just loved reading your heart here and getting to know you better yesterday during our shopping session. YOU are beautiful and it was such fun to pick out clothes for you and watch you come alive…your husband adores you and it was amazing watching his loving eyes on you as you put on clothes you never would have picked for yourself and see you glow…and girl, you don’t need new clothes to glow, you do that all on your own…but sometimes we just need some re-packaging to make us feel a little more confident. I hope I did that for you and I was extremely blessed to be with you. I hope you’ll post pics of the new you…can’t wait to see what God whispers to your heart this week…He thinks you’re beautiful exactly as you are…inside AND out…and thank you always for offering help to me for my pitiful blogging! love you, Shari
What, no pictures of the shopping trip??
I can so relate to everything you wrote. YOU KNOW THAT, of course.
It was delightful chatting with you. My stomach was flip-flopping too. I share your heart for blogging, and I also came away convicted that I need to make a quiet time a priority.
Luv ya, sistah!
JL
Jo-Lynne's last blog post..Hello from the Shore!
Oh my gosh, you are cracking me up because I felt so stinky the whole time!! I totally understand!!
And I have discovered this year that quiet time indeed makes all the difference. It is FREE and it is better than Prozac. The days I miss – which lately, have been a lot – go so much more hectic-ly. Prayers that you will stay committed!
Lisa –
You are so sweet! Thanks for your encouragement. You were one of my favorite people this weekend. I enjoyed our one on one interaction, when I had the chance! Snippets here and snippets there…You come across as very genuine and real, and I felt very comfortable with you. Thanks for your kinds thoughts and words,
Blessings,
holly