It seems I am constantly looking and thinking about an answer to this question. I know that God says in the Bible we should assemble with other Christians. When we felt God leading us to visit other churches than the one we had been attending for several years, Howard said something to me that’s stuck. We found the church that we are in now and he said not to get involved for awhile. He said when you get involved, you find out the behind-the-scenes stuff that makes it difficult to worship God. Howard is very often right and I struggle with telling him that all the time.
So I stayed out of “stuff” and off committees for awhile, but I literally couldn’t take it any more. I wanted to get involved — to do my part for God. Turns out that when I did get involved there were some conflicts that came about. Not anything major, but I think that I made some other women feel uncomfortable around me — defensive — and that wasn’t my intent at all. I backed out of doing anything in the church but running the sound board. It has impacted the way I feel when I go to church now.
About a month ago, Callie started playing Upward basketball with a local church. If you’re not familiar with the program, I highly recommend it. It teaches the kids about Jesus while teaching them about the sport as well. They also have a kids mission program on Wednesday nights and Callie’s asked me to take her there for some of the meetings. While she’s in the meetings, I go to listen to the pastor give a Bible study and they do a prayer meeting. The times I’ve gone there have been a blessing to say the least and makes me wonder how right Howard is — I mean if we worship when we are not involved in the “goings on” of the church, then why do we go? Obviously someone has to do the work?
I know churches are full of sinners and that things rarely work smoothly even in God’s House. I’m sad for that, and I do want to do my part. I’m just not sure what that part is anymore. What does church mean to you?
You have to remember that the church in the Bible didn’t have all the programs that are offered now. Therefore, there shouldn’t have to be any one who “works” in the church. The church has become a place of programs that takes a lot of time out of our lives. Time we should be using to fellowship, pray, and have Bible study with other believers. I truly believe the family integrated church is more biblical than the church we know these days. I have been relieved since we started going to the family integrated church because we don’t have to be at church 4 or 5 days a week. We go on Sunday and that is it. We do try to fellowship with other believers during the week and we try to have family Bible study. To me, all the rest is just busy work that is not biblical. I could not be the wife and mom I am today when we used to be so involved in the church. All the things that I had to prepare to do at church took time away from my children and husband. God did not make the church first. He made the family first. My husband comes first, then my children, and then the church. Of course, I have to read God’s word daily and pray daily, because my relationship with him should be above all else. If I am not right with him, then I cannot be the wife and mom I need to be. Church to me is fellowship, prayer, and Bible study with other believers. Unfortunately, I think church has become “that place where we HAVE to go on Sunday(twice),Monday for visitation, Wednesday for Bible study, and maybe some other night for some other program.” It has become a place instead of a group of people. This is not right! We should be spending more time with our family instead of more time at church!!